Jumat, 09 Desember 2011

Bigfoot in Gated Community Violates HOA Rules

The joke starts out “How do you get rid of a 700 pound Bigfoot?” Of course, the answer is obvious, “You complain to the president of the HOA.” That is pretty much what happened in real life at the Sunny Acres Waterside Condos in Orlando, Florida.

A story in the Orlando Sentinel has everyone on the east side of Orlando looking twice out their patio doors this week as there have been several alleged bigfoot sightings at Sunny Acres. The community’s HOA has been put on high alert. The sightings are all emanating from one residence, that of Harry Peterson, a Korean War veteran, who has lived at Sunny Acres for almost a decade. Peterson claims he doesn’t know what the hubbub is all about.

“I live at the danged place and I haven’t seen anything suspicious,” claims Harry, who was preparing to put a dish of diced sirloin on the patio for the stray cat he claims has been hanging around lately.

 “That ain’t no cat Harry’s feeding,” said neighbor Gladys Kravitz, who is one of the residents who swears she has seen the bigfoot, or skunk ape as many in Florida refer to such creatures. Gladys and several of the neighbors she’s told the story to have banded together and complained to the HOA about Harry harboring a bigfoot.

“While I can’t find it specifically within the pages of the Declaration,” said Gladys, “I’m sure something like this is completely against the rules,” she said as she was readying herself to meet some neighbors for karaoke night at the clubhouse.

Meanwhile, Harry says he will fight the HOA on the issue. “I got a letter demanding I get rid of the skunk ape within ten days or I am going to face fines and possible eviction from the community. How the hell can I get rid of an imaginary creature?” he asked.

Harry says he hasn’t heard of anything as ridiculous as this since his pal, Sol Weinstein, faced heavy fines last year for painting his front door red and refusing to remove a peace sign bumper sticker from his Prius. “At some point in time, you have to ask yourself if you really care that your neighbor is parking his RV alongside his home.”

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